Grand Plan at the Kingdom by the River (8)

By Peter G. Jimenea/ Hole of Justice

Two employees of the Kingdom by the River have been de facto fired and deprived of their salaries for the month of February.

Thanks to Oplan Pagbag-o, the deformed version of pagbag-o (change) that King Tura promised during the last electoral campaign.

Nine months since he sat on the throne, King Tura’s most palpable achievement in that field is to have an incompetent but highhanded Hydrocephallus installed as Kawkaw head last September.

The next success of Oplan Pagbag-o came in December, when Hydrocephallus wrestled an executive order that de facto dissolved three offices, his own, that of Ma’am Malou who headed the Kingdom Information Office (KIO) and Radyo Mo, a two-way radio facility that connects the palace to the municipalidades of the kingdom, and their merger into a new office Kawpid whose head is none other than Hydrocephallus himself.

But Ma’am Malou opposed and rightly, the merger and dissolution of her office and position. She questioned that before the Civil Service. For that, Hydrocephallus and conspirators like Tibakla and Gin Butlog arbitrarily deleted the names of Ma’am Malou and her assistant Bikya from the payroll. They told Ma’am Malou and Bikya their salaries will only be restored once they concede to their demotion by filing with the human resource job descriptions and positions different from their current ones. For example, Hydrocephallus, Tibakla and Gin Butlog want Ma’am Malou to register herself only as Administrative Officer V, not as head of the KIO.

I have never seen such highhandedness and official abuse at the Kingdom by the River, not even during the reign of King Rading when the entire archipelago of Las Islas de Malaya was under military rule.

What qualifies Hydrocephallus is a big question. He had lost his high paying position  as communication consultant of an NGO in Guam(aras) funded by the Canadian Urban Institute (CUI) after fellow employees petitioned higher ups to kick him out due to his highhandedness. 


That debacle of his debacle came after he was caught red handed copying verbatim other's news articles that led to his loss of employment as correspondent of a national broadsheet. And he is being groomed to protect the image and good name of the kingdom and that of King Tura?

His rapid promotion to chief of Kawpid skirted the requirements of publication of job opening and invitation to interested applicants and screening through the Kingdom Selection Board (KSB).

Opposition Bord Jerri recalls that the parliament did appropriate 9.7 million combined budget for Kawkaw, KIO and Radio Mo but denied that the legislature had the intent to dissolve three offices and merge them into one when they enacted the budget. Only the budget was enacted, not the creation of KAWPID. He will be delivering a privileged speech deploring how the august body was misled into appropriating 9.7 million to a non-existing office.


Ellen of Troy, key member of Oplan Pagbag-o who took and retook the civil service examination again, again and again, but did not notch a score beyond 50 percent, has a lot of explaining to why she allowed a fictitious office in the budget proposal she submitted to King Tura.

Hydrocephallus never learned. Last year, he lobbied to have his Muni-Muni promoted at the Hospicio de Gran Salvador. He failed and that angered him which led to an angry confrontation between him and the general manager and hospicio co-owner Doc Joanna.

His Muni-Muni resigned and after that, he created a web page and filled with filth that he threw on Doc Joanna who, in turn, fought back by hailing Hydrocephallus and his Muni-Muni to court.

Hydrocephallus flaunts his sick mind by parading Muni-Muni at the palace of the kingdom and de facto made her assistant by entrusting to her the keys of his offices. He just does not care whether fellow subjects personally knew his legal wife who was named after the great American baseball star, Baby Ruth or The Babe.

He is now in deep trouble because his former business partner and friend, Kalipay, lately testified against him and identified him before as responsible for the slanderous webpage. Unknowingly he himself had confirmed that on text messaging that Kalipay secretly kept and later presented to the court.

Nine months since he started his reign, King Tura has only one palpable achievement of pagbag-o that he had promised during the campaign, which is the Grand Plan, unbeknownst to him to have been hatched by Hydrocephallus and Jijimon Mutya, to pave the way to the entrance of Bigboy and his Jijimon media, and Oplan Pagbag-o itself which led to the displacement of two employees, Ma’am Malou and Bikya who now are worried where to find the money to feed their families after they were scratched from the payroll. (to be continued)